One of the least understood addictions is one that is getting all kinds of publicity these days – sex addiction.

In fact, even professionals don’t agree about what the subject entails. Is it an addiction in the same way that drugs and alcohol are? Or is it a form of obsessive compulsive disorder? How can you differentiate between someone who is addicted to sex and someone who is simply loves to have sex.

Some ideas about sex addiction seem to be agreed upon. One is that it is indeed a problem when someone is unable to control their sexual behaviour, even when they wish they could. And when the addict is willing to ignore health, family, their spouse, and their job and finances, then this points to the behaviour being a real problem.

So, what is sex addiction, exactly and which behaviours does it include? People who are self-described sex addicts will often need to have consensual sex with different partners several times a week. And it doesn’t matter if they are married or in a long-term relationship.

It can also involve the compulsive drive to consume pornography. This can include sex films, magazines, or pornography on the Internet. It might also include live sex lines or Internet chat rooms.

People who exhibit this kind of behaviour seem to be compensating for other problems. These could include childhood traumas related to things like sexual abuse. Sometimes they’re manifesting a fear of intimacy, or difficulties with self-esteem. But it’s not easy to generalize.

Sex addiction has been in the headlines because of high-profile people like Tiger Woods, who was found to have had sex with at least 19 different women – even though he is married with young children.

David Duchovny of X-Files fame has admitted to being a sex addict and has spent time in a rehab facility to recover from the addiction. Interestingly, Duchovny even plays someone with the disorder on his show, Californication.

Many people can’t imagine that a thing such exists. Our image of the eligible bachelor with a different woman every night has always been held up as something positive and desirable. Other men think they’d like to be in that position.

But when does pursuing sex cross the line and become something that can’t be controlled?

One thing that seems clear is that sex addiction has many of the same negative consequences that arise from other forms of addictive behaviour. There can be a craving to engage in sex more than the person actually wants to. And there can be withdrawal symptoms when one tries to stop.

Beyond that, there can often be a feeling of remorse after “acting out” that is similar to the drug addict having regrets about going on a binge.

Treatment for sex addiction is also similar to other addictions. There are rehab facilities that cater to sex addiction (as well as other forms of addiction), and there are 12-step groups that focus on this.

The solution isn’t a quick fix (no pun intended), but it takes hard work. But first it takes a willingness to try.

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