Intervention

How to help the substance abuser without enabling

Many friends or relatives of drug and alcohol abusers wonder how they can best help their loved one. Unfortunately, many actually make things worse because they help the substance abuser to avoid the consequences of their actions. And this only leads to more difficulty in recovering.

Here are some important but easy to follow steps that can help:

Don’t rescue the abuser: this is one of the key ways that supportive people can do more harm than good. They help the abuser cover up what’s happening to them by lying for them to help them get out of problems. They will also "save" them from suffering from the results of their substance use. Relatives and friends of abusers must stop saving them. It is essential that the abuser feel the negative impact of their behaviour.

Stop enabling: anyone who loves and cares for an addict will want to ease their suffering. They will tend to let them do what they want, figuring they have enough problems without being told what to do. This is the wrong way to look at it. Don’t pay their debts for them. Don’t pay their rent either. And, hard as it might be, don’t bail them out of jail.

Choose the best time to intervene: it is very important that the addict be receptive to your approach when you’re trying to get them to change their behaviour. Make sure they’re not high or stoned or drunk when you talk to them. They won’t listen. And make sure you have privacy so that they’ll be receptive.

Give specific examples of problems: tell the abuser exactly how their addiction has hurt you. Give them examples of this so that they’ll understand. Let them know that you want to help but that you won’t facilitate their addictive.

Let them know the consequences: it is important that the addict understand that you will impose consequences if they don’t change. These are designed to protect you, not to punish the addict. Consequences might include staying away from the addict when they are high, or even asking them to live somewhere else. Once you do this, don’t back down.

Get others to accompany you: don’t confront the addict alone if you can enlist the help of other friends and family. The more people are involved in the intervention, the more impact it will have on the addict. Don’t gang up on the person; tell the person calmly and one at a time how you feel.

Listen to what the addict says: watch out for signs that the abuser is considering your offer of help. If they begin asking questions about what would be involved in their going to rehab, this is a good sign. The best thing to do is direct the addict to a professional to get the correct answers. Be supportive but don’t wait to act. Make all necessary preparations for the addict to enter rehab.

Family Intervention Works

The plain truth is, interventions for those with drug or alcohol dependencies work!

Statistically, few people who are addicted to drugs or alcohol are willing to admit that it's become a problem they can no longer control. Fewer still are willing to seek treatment on their own. Some do—the lucky ones, who are able to acknowledge the problem and take concrete steps toward getting well. Interventions are for those who won’t (or can’t) admit that their problem is now too big for them to solve by themselves.

Intervention uses the power of a group—usually family or friends—to encourage the individual drug addict/alcoholic to break through his or her barriers of denial. It’s that denial that keeps them “stuck” in the problem: seeing their drinking or using behavior as a solution to their problems (anxiety, stress at work, family struggles, feelings of uselessness or self-pity), rather than the problem itself.

Recent studies published by the National Institute on Drug Abuse have verified “forced or coerced participation in treatment can be very effective.” When dealing with a friend, business colleague or family member who is locked behind that denial, intervention may be the only way to literally intervene, forcing the person to face reality before it’s too late. Without intervention, the addict/alcoholic—and those who care about him or her—face many more years of pain and heartache. This may be the only means available to save the chemically dependent person’s life.

What is Drug Intervention?

It is a planned attempt by one or more (usually family or close friends) people to get an unwilling person to begin to seek professional help for an addiction to some sort of substance abuse.

How do you know when someone is addicted?

When someone goes from enjoying a substance, to craving that substance, thus, results in losing control and actions.

When is it necessary to use intervention?

When you’ve witnessed that your love one no longer has a control of his/her life and his /her action have become irrational, due to substance abuse and are particularly in denial.

Understanding addiction:

People who are addicted to drugs do not believe they have a problem, and if there is a problem, they say it is your problem. Normally when we have a problem, we try to understand the root of the problem in order to solve the problem. It works the same way with an addict. An addict is no longer is in control and cannot break free from the clutches of the substance’s power.

People by nature are curious, we try all kinds of things because we are always looking to relax and having pleasure. The brain is fooled into thinking that when we use a substance, it is "normal", when the substance is absent, something is wrong, so we continue to be "normal" and as we become "normal", addiction sets in and as a result causes negative changes in personality that can lead to more destructive behavior.

There are many reasons where an addiction can stem from, the most common are; peer pressure (social), easy access, loneliness, anxiety and depression, and on many occasions, genetics. One of the dishonors of society is that bad, weak and undesirable people are addicts which in itself brings an even lower self-esteem to an addict, (the lower he/she feels, the more he/she uses) where in reality, good, nice and the well-educated people as well are all prone to addiction, no one is exempt. This stereotype has to go away.

You want to help someone and you love this person so you are already familiar with his/her personality before the addiction and it is where you want to bring him/her back to. Possibly you can remember the circumstances surrounding this person when the substance abuse

began, he/she may not remember until they go to treatment. It is really important how you approach an intervention, just telling the person that you are concerned about their health and well being is not enough to change his/her addictive behavior. The approach can be as deadly as a force.

I believe having empathy is very important in the planning of an intervention. You would have a higher success rate of getting your love one to accept professional help if you can understand what your love one is going through. Research, knowledge, talking to professional interventionist can help educate one before taking steps to an intervention.

What does an intervention entails:

An interventionist will work with you on a few occasions to plan the intervention. During this time you will assemble a group of family and friends to harmonize all participants in the intervention.

A meeting will be called with everyone where you’ll learn more about the substance and its effect on your love one and yourselves. Each may be asked to document the impact the love one’s addiction has on everyone. This is where your pre research and pre knowledge will come in handy; already understanding, you can be objective with the assessment. The interventionist will then discuss the plan with the group and let each one know what is needed from them. It is very important to be a team, a team of empathic people, a team that understands the necessity to maintain the firmness of their commitment to helping their love one.

The intervention takes place, each member of the group will share their previously written document, which would be non judgmental and with empathy. Understand that the addict may react poorly, so have patience and expect the worst, if this occurs, don’t react, just let him/her vent. If anything gets out of hand, the interventionist is there to bring things back to order. Remember, you are there to show love, concern and to express how the addiction is affecting you.

After the point is made and the love one is willing to go into treatment, arrangements will be made where the love one can immediately be taken to the treatment center.

The interventionist will report all the findings from the intervention on the addict to the treatment center team.

You will have assistance also, because this is a tough love situation you found yourself in and need to be coped. Everyone is a victim and there is no blame, just understanding.

Personally, I think a good question to ask someone in this situation (addict) is "what do you want from life?" This question always seems to give a person the go ahead to say even the

most farfetched things, but in there, you will find the real answer. Listen, question and answer accordingly.

Once detoxified, someone would have to keep his or her word and do not let the love one down.